I want to advise the people out there who may be having difficulty with toxic parental relationships. Here's the disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist and cannot give counsel to the public outside of my scope of authority concerning episodes for psychotherapy. I am a Holistic Health Practitioner that promotes health and wellness, and one of the means that I use is self-awareness first.
What I am about to say is for those people who want to remove the toxic energy from their childhoods that still show up today in the conscious and unconscious mind. The things that left a negative imprint on you as a child in your parental relationships.
First, let me remind you that no one has a perfect childhood. Yes, there are levels of extremes from one to the next regarding childhood trauma, but you can still see a way out of a toxic relationship with your parents or guardians today with practice.
How to begin? Well, ask yourself this. What do you like and dislike about yourself now? The things that you like/dislike about yourself as an individual mirror the feelings towards your parents or guardians today.
Some examples of what you might like about yourself are that you're a good parent, listener, love to cook, like to draw, play instruments, sing, easy on the eyes, like to study, have a beautiful smile, etc. Contribute all of these positive attributes to your genetic or learned information to balance the toxic behaviors interconnecting with you.
The type of work you do, hobbies, how you treat your children and other people can give you insight into your family values. What you like or dislike about yourself adds value to your individuality and contributes to your goals in life.
So, if you’re triggered by a moment where your parents or guardian were not so perfect, then remind yourself today of the good things that you carry on from them, and get rid of the bad. Even if you don’t know anything about your guardians, or they were losers. You can use that energy to be a better person and allow it to motivate you. With this attitude, you can ascend higher in the realms of spirituality.
In the physical realm, everything is weighed by our emotions and how we feel about one another, so it’s easy to remain stuck in one negative thought about our relationships with our parents/guardians. I challenge you to discover all of the good things that you like about yourself and then instill it when triggers show up in the form of toxic parents or guardians.