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2021 TIPS | For Protecting Children from Abuse

2/24/2021

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▷www.realityinbalance.com 
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△Sexual Abuse Awareness
△Holistic Health Tips


❖ PROTECT CHILDREN | from Sexual Abuse


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❖ According to adult retrospective studies,  1 and 4 women and 1 and 6 men were sexually abused before the age of 18 years old. This statement means there are more than 42 million adult survivors of child sexual abuse in the U.S.
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​73% of child victims do not tell anyone about the abuse for at least one year. 45% do not tell anyone for at least five years. Some may never disclose- children of every gender, race, ethnicity, background, social-economic status, and family structure are at risk. No child is immune.

❖ TIPS to PROTECT CHILDREN | from Sexual Abuse


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➠ Teach your child about boundaries. Let your child know that no one has the right to touch them or make them feel uncomfortable- this includes hugs from grandparents or even tickling from mom or dad. It is crucial to let your child know that their body is their own. Just as importantly, remind your child that they do not have the right to touch someone else if that person does not want to be touched.

➠ Teach your child how to talk about their bodies. From an early age, teach your child the names of their body parts. Teaching a child these words gives them the ability to come to you when something is wrong. Learn more about ➠talking to children about sexual assault.

➠ Be available. Set time aside to spend with your child where they have your undivided attention. Let your child know that they can come to you if they have questions or if someone is talking to them in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable. If they do come to you with questions or concerns, follow through on your word and take the time necessary to talk.


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➠ Let them know they won’t get in trouble. Many perpetrators use secret-keeping or threats as a way of keeping children quiet about the abuse. Encourage children frequently that they will not get in trouble for talking to you, no matter what they need to say. When they do come to you, follow through on this promise and avoid punishing them for speaking up.
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➠ Give them the chance to raise new topics. Sometimes asking direct questions like, “Did you have fun?” and “Was it a good time?” won’t give you the answers you need. Give your child a chance to bring up their concerns or ideas by asking open-ended questions like “Is there anything else you wanted to talk about?”
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❖ Healing ​Wounds

❖Perhaps the most tragic is the hurt and disappointment caused by intimate relationships with family members or friends, someone known and trusted involving abuse. 

Too often, adults, we retreat from dysfunctional relationships or deny the true depths of the problem to smooth suppressed wounds. Yet, we must take responsibility now as adults to understand the lessons of our relationships with ourselves first.

Emotional or energetic harm or violation from a person you trust, love, and respect can create deep resentment, anger, or rage that require committed healing work. We are responsible for protecting all children from sexual abuse before it begins.  1 and 4 women and 1 and 6 men were sexually abused before the age of 18 years old. ​


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2021 Tips | Protecting Children
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5 Tips to Protect Children | from All forms of Abuse
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Protect Yourself!



Sources: 
"How Can I Protect My Child From Sexual Assault?"
"Sacred Woman", by Queen Afua 
R.A.I.N.N

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ILLNESSES from LONG-TERM TRAUMA  |the HOLISTIC HEALTH VIEW

3/10/2019

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​"The wound is the place where the light enters you"
Rumi

​

​~Reality in ConsciousnesS
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RECHARGE and SUPPORT

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​We all know too well that 
traumatic events happen to us, neighbors, friends, relatives, and so on. It feels distressing, intolerable, and if left untreated, trauma can sustain negative lifestyle attachments and poor coping skills. A traumatic episode can take a tremendous amount of energy to pay attention to by your conscious-mind, leaving you feeling tired or drained.  This could be the reason why a lot of trauma victims gluttonize in alcohol, food, sex, drugs, and all forms of subjective pain because trauma complicates the brain area that communicates the physical embodiment of being alive. 




​Being traumatized means to perpetually organize your life as if it were still going on unchanged today. Every new encounter is challenged from the past based on adverse experiences. It could be with a new relationship or new goal that will be measured by earlier and unforeseen traumatic circumstances. Unrecognized and  displaced stress can internalize, harming your body's systems. 



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​Today, modern sciences have discovered the key to healing long-term trauma is to understand how the human body works. The development of three sciences has led to more insight into the effects of traumatic events, neglect, and abuse in a biological field of study below.


​THE 3 BRANCHES OF MODERN FIELD STUDIES: Long-Term Trauma 
​
1) Neuroscience- the study of how the brain supports the mental process.
2) Developmental psychopathology- the study of the impact of adverse experiences on the development of mind and brain.
3) Interpersonal Neural Biology-  the study of how our behaviors influence the emotions and mindset of those around us.

Learn More
Research from these fields of study have proven  how trauma brings about physiological changes. Including the recalibration of the brain’s alarm system, increase in stress hormone activity, and an alteration of the system that filters relevant information from irrelevant. ​

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Suppressing trauma does not stop stress hormones from exhausting the body.  Inhibiting emotions can delay physical senses, increasing your stress hormones and experiencing the traumatic event over again biologically. 


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​Researchers from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention have found that the more stressors that an individual have experienced in their childhood are more likely to develop physical and emotional illnesses in their adulthood.

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​Traumatic experiences like sexual abuse, mental illness in a parent, divorce, neglect, and domestic violence are linked to chronic related stress and obstacles. Chronic related stress is the form of obesity and/or heart disease are responsible for premature death that becomes a physical reality sooner or later.

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​Medically identified as Adverse Childhood Experiences- chronic stress from the effects of long-term trauma. ACES does have a lasting outcome on your health: diabetes, depression, STD’s, heart disease, cancer, stroke, COPD, suicide attempts, broken bones, and obesity are the physical ailments that will appear.

​In the physical life sector, ACES have an enduring effect regarding graduation rates, personal growth, self-education, academic achievements, goal orientations, or lost time from work.


​ACES aren’t limited to poor neighborhoods- all children of any socioeconomic classes suffer adverse events. What it comes down to is how you  respond to traumatic stress factors.


  •   dealing with it on a day-to-day
  •  able to recognize and have healthy habits around their stress response, as opposed to having unhealthy coping habits.

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​​The Greatest Stress Factors Includes:


>The Cumulative of Adversity 
>Your Potential Exposure, and How They Pile-Up 
>The Absence of The Caregiver Who Is Able To Buffer The Effect of That Chronic Stress 

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​--->Dr. Burke Harris, an American pediatrician who is the 1st and current Surgeon General of California a since 2019, founded and runs the Center for Youth Wellness in San Francisco, CA has dedicated years to treating chronic stress and raising awareness about the link between traumatic life events and our health. She believes that childhood trauma does not have to compromise our adulthood in an unhealthy manner. With the right resources and education, understanding childhood adverse reactions as a risk factor for how we’re going to deal with stress is critical. 
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​The bodies of abused victims are tensed and defensive until they can find a way to relax and feel safe. The physical sensations beneath the emotions include pressure, heat, muscular tension, tingling, caving-in, and feeling hollow. A tremendous number of people in our country are beginning to recognize that trauma lives in the body. There is a lot of prevention that can educate when people just have this information.    





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Please Leave Us  a Comment Below-

​SELF-EVALUATION:
​


​Are you physically healthy and active?


Do you like and feel comfortable in your body?


Do you enjoy your sexuality?

Are you comfortable in the physical world?

Are you practical, down to earth?
​
Are you financially stable?


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​About the Author:
​
​Shaw Nee Janelle is a Certified Holistic Health Practitioner, Health & Wellness Consultant, Author of “The Traditional Modalities for Healing” Blogger & Owner of.realitynconsciousness.com. In her blogs, she enjoys writing inspirational tips on Holistic Health, Self-Care, Afrikan Spirituality, and Sexual Abuse Awareness. She also loves to travel, fitness, reading, and creating new vegan recipes.


​


​Sources:
“​How Childhood Trauma Can Affect Your Long-Term Health”, NY Times
“Natural Health and Wellness: The Consultant Manual”,by K. Akua Gray
“The Body Keeps the Score”, by ​Bessel Van der Kolk MD

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HOW to OVERCOME TRAUMATIC MEMORIES  |   PART III   | VISUAL RELEASE MEDITATION

1/27/2019

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​"The ability to forgive is most relevant in the lives of children. As adults, people develop defense mechanisms that are intended to keep the emotions safe, instead this creates warehousing of past pains that ultimately resurface at times of emotional stress."
Dr. Akua Gray


~Reality In Consciousness 
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RESOURCES: SEXUAL ABUSE






​​Reiterating a few points extracted from Parts I and II information series on traumatic and emotional memories will carry over into Part III and conclude this series with a visual release method. 
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Once your body has memorized a specific event, it will naturally make you feel that emotion when any new and related experience occurs. In order to release traumatic experiences, it will take all of your will, focus, and dedication to do so. With this traditional knowledge of understanding, you can overcome traumatic memories by simply retraining your conscious interaction toward them. 


The PRESENT MOMENT

 


​You can rewrite the brain for joy and happiness and heal from trauma by utilizing the Visual Release Meditation method. With a repeated emotion, your body builds a tolerance to the feeling making it normal. With guidance, you can learn to have memories without the distress from traumatic experience(s).
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The brain connections (functional magnetic resonance imaging) become malleable and then resets. Which means that the memory can change a little each time it’s recalled, and resets stronger and more vividly with every recall. Studies have now shown that removing the traumatic aspect of the memory involves creating a new, safer mental association to the brain’s same sensory cues.​ 
​
​
​See Visual Meditation VIDEO and practice below.  

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VISUAL MEDITATION Video

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"I AM CHANGE"


  • Begin​ meditation, taking in a few deep breaths to relax.  
  • Say an affirmation or prayer to begin releasing, such as "I Am Change"
  • When ready, take a few more natural and slow deep breaths.
  • Image a positive experience: enrich it for 10 to 20 seconds.
  • Absorb your positive image.
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  • Now subtly begin to image your traumatic experience to release it.
  • Link your positive and negative events, but this time, focus first on the negative integration while activating your positive experiences.​​​
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  • Image moments of happiness, living freely, and with a natural child-like nature.
  • Repeat your affirmation of healing, growth, and/or forgiveness.
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  • Complete the Visual Release Meditation feeling internalized with self-control, self-awareness, self-love, and prosperity.
  • Repeat as necessary ​​

​

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​About the Author:
​
Shaw Nee Janelle is a Certified Holistic Health Practitioner, Health & Wellness Consultant, Author of  “The Traditional Modalities for Healing”, Blogger & Owner of.realitynconsciousness.com. In her blogs, she enjoys writing inspirational tips on Holistic Health, Self-Care, Afrikan Spirituality, and Sexual Abuse Awareness. She also love to travel, fitness, reading, and creating new vegan recipes.






​Sources: 4 Steps to Erasing the Trauma of Painful Memories
Erasing bad memories
​Unwanted memories: How to forget them
​
Scientists Already Know How to 'Erase' Your Painful Memories

​Natural Health and Wellness: The Consultant Manual,  by Dr. Akua
The Archeology of the Mind, by Jack Panksepp

​​


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HOW to OVERCOME  TRAUMATIC MEMORIES | PART II  |  THE BRAIN'S PROCESS of FEAR

1/13/2019

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"If you want light to come into your life,
​you need to stand where it is shining."
Guy Finely


​~Reality in Consciousness ​
​
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RESOURCES: SEXUAL ABUSE






​Almost everyone has triggered memories that they would rather not address, or know of the triggers that could bring more trauma into fruition. Traumatic memories can underline a sort of imbalances like depression, anxiety, and phobias. 

Our mental context in which a person perceives an event affects how the mind catalog the memories of that occurrence. In Part II, we will discover the basic order of operation of the
brain’s memory center by the result of emotion, and how this discovery can reverse these conditions today.  

​ 



POWER MEMORY




​We recall events in relation to other events, the environment, and so on. Once your body has memorized a heightened emotion associated with a particular experience it will naturally trigger you to feel the emotion when any new and related experience occurs.
BRAIN FOOD
Researchers have shown that harmful memories really are vivid than good ones, possibly due to the interaction between emotions and memory. Typically, so with negative memories. 
​
Neuroimaging studies have detected the process of encoding and retrieving traumatic memories involves the parts of the brain that process emotions, particularly the amygdala and orbitofrontal cortex. FMRI studies (functional magnetic resonance imaging) reveal greater cellular activity in these regions when an individual is experiencing a triggered memory.  



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More recently, western science has finally discovered that humans have a mechanism that they can utilize to block triggered memories, and even more discoveries on suppressing a memory, which involves shutting down parts of the brain that are involved in the recall.


Modern science formulated several theories in regards to how our brain process fearful memories.
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      1.  When You Witness a “scary” Event:​
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  • The thalamus relays sensory information to the amygdala, which marks the memory as emotionally significant and store for future use.  
 
  •     Neural networks in the hippocampus- the center of emotion, memory, and the autonomic nervous system, readily begin building a map of the memory’s context in the first few hours of the experience.





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​Neuroimaging studies have also discovered which brain systems play a role in
absolute forgetting, making it possible to deliberately block traumatic  memories from your consciousness. 


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  • The hippocampus cues the ventromedial prefrontal cortex of changed conditions, which inhibits neuron activity and the conditioned fear response in the amygdala.
SUPER FOOD





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Eliminating the traumatic context of memory involves creating newer, healthier mental connections to the same sensory cues. When we understand more about how a memory can be replaced or suppressed we will begin to individually help ourselves with traumatic conditions. 

​



​You can undo your
cycle of traumatic feelings simply by consistently training your habits. Once your body has inhabited a specific emotion in connection to a particular experience, it will naturally trigger how you feel that emotion when any new and related experiences occur. 





​Memories can be manipulated because they react as if made from glass, existing in a molten state as they are being created, before turning completely solid. When the memory is recalled again, it becomes molten again and can be altered before it once more resets. Each time you revisit a memory, it becomes flexible.

​

Furthermore, the longer you dwell on a specific memory or rehearse the specific experience surrounding the event the stronger neuron connections become. With a frequent and reoccurring emotion, your body builds a tolerance to the feeling, making it “normal”. 
​


You will need to restore your traumatic experience with a positive one. Relative to modern science
, suppressing a memory involves turning off the parts of the brain that are involved in recollection. To replace a memory, those same brain regions must be actively engaged in redirecting the memory towards a more balanced frame of mind.

​

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​Comment below:


  • What is your opinion on suppressing memories?
  • How does it feel to know that traumatic experiences can be changed to positive ones?
  • Is there anyone that you can share this article with?







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About the Author:
​
Shaw Nee Janelle is a Certified Holistic Health Practitioner, Health & Wellness Consultant, Author of  “The Traditional Modalities for Healing”, Blogger & Owner of.realitynconsciousness.com. In her blogs, she enjoys writing inspirational tips on Holistic Health, Self-Care, Afrikan Spirituality, and Sexual Abuse Awareness. She also love to travel, fitness, reading, and creating new vegan recipes.
 ​


​


Sources:
4 Steps to Erasing the Trauma of Painful Memories
Erasing bad memories
​Unwanted memories: How to forget them
​
Scientists Already Know How to 'Erase' Your Painful Memories
​
​​

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5 HOLIDAY-WELLNESS TIPS | for a #StrEss #Free SEXUAL ABUSE SURVIVOR

11/21/2018

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​“Take a Deep Breath. Get Present in the Moment and Ask Yourself, What is Important at this Very Second”-Greg Mckeown

~Reality in Balance
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recharge & support group

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52-inspirational affirmations!



​The way I’ve always had seem to recall during the holiday season is that there are only two avenues around this time of year that a sexual abuse survivor would consider to promote wellness and remain stress-free.

​

1.) Proceed to all your holiday functions ill prepared as a guest, because no one has seen your darling face for a while anyways.


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OR
2.) Steer far away from unnecessary triggers by following my 5 Holiday-Wellness Tips for a #Stress #Free Sexual Abuse Survivor!  
​

My​ 5 Holiday-Wellness Tips for a #Stress #Free Sexual Abuse Survivor is a way for you to arrive at those customary gatherings with confidence amongst family and friends. You will be visibly radiant, stronger in character, and a perseverance that one or more persons can gain a sense of balance from.
​
​My guidance during the holiday season is for you to only give your energy to those who you feel are supportive of you. While at the same time, I understand that this approach may not always be the “right” solution for the holidays like the ones that you can just readily ignore! 

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AWAY NEGATIVE VIBES!


​I Develop a Plan   ​

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​As a sexual abuse survivor, you will need to empower yourself and initiate a plan of action before the holiday season begins to roll around again. Please, do not show up like, "I’m here and just about done with this sad show of people already"! Instead, develop a plan for your visits, making it easier for you to be with the ones that you love.

A plan that you can easily develop for your traditional get-togethers should be ideas such as an arrival time, how to respond to testy inquisitors, exit strategies, or how to be cordial with certain people is THE standard blueprint to remain stress-free and confident. Start with a plan and stick to it, no matter what! One successful method to start with is your intention and focus on your feelings and ways to keep calm in a stress-free environment.
​
Meditation is a good source for grounding intention. It refers to a family of self-regulation practices that focus on training attention and awareness in order to bring mental processes under greater voluntary control and thereby foster general mental well-being and development in specific capacities such as calm, clarity, and concentration  (Roger Walsh & Shauna L. Shapiro 2006).”  I like to practice a form of meditation known as Breath Therapy to bridge my intentions and refocus back to myself.


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breath therapy

    II GET SUPPORT
build a dynamic support system
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​My second Holiday-Wellness Tip for a Sexual Abuse Survivor is surprisingly one that is the most forgotten about. At the major or minor holiday event with relatives or friends, ensure to establish support before you attend! Trust a holiday attendee that you can speak to directly about your level of comfort in regards to whichever festivity that you guys will be a part of.


​It could be your spouse, a close relative, or friend that you can confide in. Use this time to be realistic about your situation and brutally honest about how you feel. As a sexual abuse survivor, a long and triggering explanation is unnecessary, and furthermore, it isn't owed to anyone. So keep your mission short and precise. What’s more important here is to receive support, just in case the exit door becomes your haven during the holiday season​. 
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LEARN MORE
                                                       III    DO NOT ENGAGE in SENSITIVE TOPICS


​Oh boy, there are a lot of delicate topics to go around for more than two lifetimes, but for this holiday season, do yourself a favor and take this opportunity for the perfect time to completely zone out. For the present concerns of today, sensitive topics like the “me too” movement or the never-ending sight of the zillion sex scandals should be avoided as a sexual abuse survivor at this time..

​All-in-all, these subjects on television can easily lead to unavoidable triggers. Besides the mere fact that a stranger’s sexual abuse case is easily discussed out in the open during the holidays, while potentially amid a sexual victim is being insensitive to others. Do not engage in sensitive topics!
​
As a sexual abuse survivor, always focus on shifting your awareness from sensitive topics to a form of positivity because the holiday season is for cheer and a year of closure.



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​​IV FOCUS on GRATITUDE


After all, the reason why we come together for the holidays is to celebrate one another. This may be difficult as a sexual abuse survivor while in the presence of unwelcoming personalities. Nevertheless, remind yourself why you have chosen to be present amongst friends and family during this time.

A good point of reference to remember is your internal guidance, which brought you to the event in the first place. Your inner guidance is the strong-willed force that is backed up with the courage to follow through. We refer to this high gravitational space as gratitude, allowing us to be with friends and family again in the physical sense, such as for the holiday season.



subtle breaths
                                                                                        V REMEMBER to BREATHE

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​Never hold your breath, but always remember to breathe through all circumstances during holiday traditions. Sometimes being in crowded areas as a sexual abuse survivor, you may need a break from visiting with family and friends, and this is okay. Make an excuse to use the restroom or just step away for a little while. 


Go outside and breathe slowly through your nose and out through your mouth. Take this moment to give thanks for your ability to do this. No matter the excuse, always listen to your body. During the holiday gathering, if you are experiencing a sensation of overwhelming feelings, always remember that slow and deep breathing is a technique to alleviate stressors. 



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So, you do not have to talk the night away at holiday visits anymore, but instead, always remain in charge with My 5 Holiday-Wellness Tips for a Sexual Abuse Survivor:  (1)an unbreakable plan, (2)back up support, (3)disengaging sensitive topics, (4)focus on gratitude, and (5) controlled breathing are destined to promote balance and well-being.


​
☤Your Reality in Balance begins at the very moment when work is placed forth by your intent to grow and change for the betterment of self, aiding in the improvement of mankind! Balance & Peace...

​


About the Author:
​
Shaw Nee Janelle is a
  • Certified Holistic Health Practitioner
  •  Health & Wellness Consultant
  • Spiritual Healer
  •  Author of  “The Traditional Modalities for Healing”
  •  Blogger 
  •  Owner of.realitynconsciousness.com.
In her blogs, she enjoys writing inspirational tips on Holistic Health, Self-Care, Afrikan Spirituality, and Sexual Abuse Awareness. She also loves to travel, fitness, reading, and creating new vegan recipes.

 ​​


protecting children
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Source: 
​
"The meeting of meditative disciplines and western psychology: A mutually enriching dialogue"
 (Roger Walsh & Shauna L. Shapiro 2006). 

​

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